Provo Canyon, Utah—Bridal Veil Falls, beloved Provo landmark and hotspot for polygamists and potheads, has been renamed in honor of the career woman. The action came by executive order of Michelle Kaufusi, Provo’s first female mayor.
Known for laying waste to other long-standing Provo hallmarks, such as Bulldog Boulevard and the Freedom Festival’s 4th of July parade, Kaufusi said that deciding to ruin this one, “was a cinch.”
“After the Church stopped making women veil their faces,” Kaufusi said, “I instantly knew that the title ‘Bridal Veil’ would be offensive to women everywhere. Only a female mayor would have this kind of insight, and it is my job as a woman in power to protect women who are all innately fragile.”
One Provo resident rejoiced in the change, saying, “Every time I looked at those falls I always felt so oppressed. Veils are a symbol of how men hate women. The only problem is that the falls still look like a bride’s veil. If only we could convince nature to be less misogynistic.”