Salt Lake City, UT—President Nelson announced 8 new mega-malls at the close of General Conference. As he announced the locations for the new malls President Nelson asked viewers in their various locations not to cheer but to bow their heads in a prayer of gratitude.
After the announcement protestors flocked to the Church Administration Building to voice their outrage. “Jesus never built no malls!” the crowd chanted, as well as, “Hey, hey! Ho, ho! The evil malls have got to go!” Afterwards, the protestors were seen at City Creek mall buying lunch.
In response to the protests, Church Spokesman Doug Anderson said, “We build these malls for a reason—so we can build more malls later. We wouldn’t be worth infinity billion dollars if we didn’t.”