Washington D.C.—Last week Utah Senator Mitt Romney (R?) introduced a bill in the Senate that would enshrine the freshman’s righteousness in law. The bill is simple: if passed it would create a new national holiday—Mitt Romney Day—commemorating the one and only righteous member of the 116th Congress of the United States.
Senator Romney is the legislation’s sponsor. There are currently no cosponsors.
“I’m not surprised that there is no support for the bill,” remarked the senator, “In fact, I fully expected this kind of rejection; ‘a prophet hath no honour in his own country,’ as they say.”
The bill is not expected to pass the Senate, with preliminary votes tallied at 99 – 1.
While the bill may be unpopular, the once presidential nominee may not be so unpopular among his own constituents. Jenna Davis, a cashier at a retailer in Lehi says, “I admire [Mitt Romney] for going his own way. It takes real integrity to be the only one voting for what you believe is right.” When asked if she would celebrate Mitt Romney Day, Davis replied, “Yeah, I can see myself doing that. Wouldn’t you?”
Sara (last name withheld), a family life major at Brigham Young University, says that she likes the idea of Mitt Romney Day. “I think it would be good to celebrate the fact that there’s (sic) actually a lot of people in Utah and in the church who want to appear both conservative and liberal at the same time,” she says.
Fellow Utah senator Mike Lee defended Romney, although, he has announced that he would not support the bill. “I believe Mitt is voting his conscience,” said Lee, “I just think his conscience is broken.”
Senator Romney has repeatedly broken ranks with the GOP and cites this as evidence of his impeccable virtue. “After time has sorted out the righteous from the wicked,” Romney says, “I want to be remembered as the only honest senator in the history of the United States—that is—after I made sure my vote was of absolutely no consequence at all. That is what Mitt Romney day is all about.”